Requiem of a Heart: A Kingdom Hearts Story
by Zebrakillzunicorn
Summary: What path must we each take to find true happiness? What sort of obstacles must we face in order to find this happiness? This is a story who's characters lived before the times of the keyblade masters, their friends, and their enemies.
1. Prologue

Prologue

_Hope, love, and faith. These three things are the building blocks that keep one's spirit alive, though love being the most important of them all; without love, one could not hope to love, nor could one remain faithfully in love. For one without these three virtues should find themselves swathed in shadows, completely eclipsed, and devoured up until every last bit of thier humanity is forever lost..._

_The spirit of humankind is like a candle, searching all inward parts of one's self. Without the kindle of the three building blocks, one's flame cannot thrive, and will ultimately die. This is why the darkness seeks out the hopefull, the faithfull, and the kind-hearted. It knows of their weakness, and will try to shut it away forever, and claim victims to join its midst-trophies of a sort that help the darkness grow, and grow, and grow..._

_If one is to keep their face towards their light, they shall never know of the temptations which the shadows bear. However, such ignorance is but an addition to their weakness, or an even greater weakness all-together. If one strengthens their heart by tempering it with hope, and faith, then they shall know of a love that will know no bounds-a limitless love that shall radiate from their soul, and keep the darkness at bay..._

_However, darkness may come in bolder forms, and will attempt to cut us off from this light we try to achive. There will come a time when there is no option but to plunge into the depths of the shadows, and try to uncover the light-dare to reach your hand into the darkness, so that you may pull another into the light. This is a time of great trials, and tribulations; seemingly unending conflict within one's self, or out, or even sometimes both. Do not forget about the three virtues you hold dear..._

_The light you shine will by a light that will kindle the flames of the hearts of the masses, and with this light you give, others will gladly share back with you in return. There is no undying light, for even when in the deepest pits of sorrow and dispair, light will always find a way to pierce through teh veil, and shine with its upmost intensity.__One thing that always stands out is that at the bottom of the abyss comes the voice of salvation. The black moment is the moment when the real message of transformation is going to come. At the darkest moment comes the light..._

_The strongest light is born of the darkness, so the faith, love, and hope that springs forth from the conflict is the best. If you hold strong to the virtues you hold dear, you will prevail over your darkness, and will be known to all as triumphant. So fear not, worry not, and scorn not, for you will become the greatest weapon against the darkness that man has ever seen..._

_Though think not little of your trials, and your tribulations, for the closer you come to your light, the greater your shadow becomes._


	2. Chapter 1: Perpetual Dream

Chapter 1: Perpetual Dream

_"Darkness...Darkness is all that lies before my eyes, and it is...It is everything I see. What is this? Where am I? Why am I not dreaming?" _A voice echoed through the void of sleep, a realm which all must visit, though the comprehension of such a place seemed to escape this person's mind_. _The voice was that of a young man's, soft, innocent, yet it seemed troubled, and it quivered with anxiety as the young man tried to make sense of what was before him. Fear rose up from the pits of his heart, and he soon began to feel helpless before the void around him. _"Take me not!"_ He cried out as he tried to cover his eyes-a naive attempt to guard himself from the darkness that seemed to peer into his soul. However, in trying to do so he found that his body could not move. _"Has the darkness already devoured me?"_ He asked himself, fearing for the worst as his body lingered uselessly in the darkness of the void. _"I fear it has..."_ His voice-now choaked with sorrow-whispered through the plaines of the darkness, seeming as if he was weeping.

_**"Fear not, oh bright star!" **_A voice, no, it was nothing but words from an enigmatic source that entered the young man's mind. It echoed through his thoughts, taking on his own voice, though it was pure like the sound of a trickling brook. The voice was as soft as velvet, and as sweet as honey. It shocked the young man at first, though the warmth that he felt from these words that entered his head caused his weeping to end, and the fear inside of him to disappear. _**"The light you possess is stronger than any weapon you hold." **_The voice continued to reassure the young man as he drifted in the darkness, though it perplexed him. _"What light? What are you talking about?"_ The young man pleaded, though there was nothing but silence. Suddenly, he began to feel the warmth that had been growing inside of him suddenly take to new hieghts, and the young man began to feel as though he were sitting upon his favorite grassy knoll in the middle of the spring. He could picture it now: The rays of sunlight hitting his skin as he lay upon the soft bed of grass beneath him, and the wind blowing gently through the fields around the knoll. Birds chirped in a single tree behind him-a large, old, and magnificent oak tree-as the wind rocked it back and forth. The sound of leaves hissing in the wind was like a melody to which could put the young man to sleep with; he felt like he could stay here for all eternity.

As he tried to see through the darkness, his body began to slowly come in to view as he looked down. He realized his body was now relinquished from the grips of the fear that completely consumed him, and he began to examine his body as it slowly shone through the darkness. At first he looked transparent, but then he could notice how concrete he was, and the more and more he became apparent, he realized the light that he possessed was revealed to him by this unknown entity. Like a moonbeam, he illuminated the darkness around him so that he could see as he now drifted slowly down towards solid ground. The surface of this solid plaine was glazed in the light that eminated off the young man, and it allowed him to see around him. There truly was nothing here, nothing at all but emptiness, and a cold gloom that fell like a cloud of mist from the walls of the darkness around him, surrounding the young man. The light, however, warded off this evil cloud so that it would not touch him. _"What is this place?"_ He questioned himself as he looked around to gaze at the nothingness surrounding him. It was surreal to him as he stood there on the plaines of the darkness. He knew it was a dream, there just couldn't be any physical way he could be in this place.

What was this void? Why could the young man not wake up from his slumber? Maybe he **was** there, though not in body, but in soul? Had the darkness brought him here in an attempt to drown him in despair? Maybe, though why was this voice calling out to him? Why was it even there to begin with? It could've been a being that resided within him, and awoke when he was brought to this place of darkness. _**"Now step forth, and awake renewed."**_ The voice echoed through his mind again, encouraging him to walk along some mysterious path that the young man could not see. Where was this voice intending to lead him? He felt obligated to obey it since it vanquished the fear that had settled within him. _**"Your destiny is a path that basks in the light. You must be on guard at all times, for your shadow will always follow behind in your footsteps. As you grow stronger, so will your shadow..." **_The voice instructed him as the young man weightlessly walked forward, unknowing of his destination, though he followed the direction in which his heart pulled him in. _"What is this perpetual dream?" _He questioned once more, hoping that this time the voice would answer him directly, though it seemed on only informing him of some destiny that was unknown to the young man.

_**"Fear not, oh bright star! Your light is the most important weapon against the darkness!"**_ The young man was startled by the voice again for some unknown reason. He searched all around him to find some form of entity standing before him, or the figure of a person lingering within the darkness, but the young man could find nothing...Nothing at all. _"Who are you!" _The young man exclaimed, finally becoming frustrated with the entity that seemed so immersed in toying with the young man. _**"Fear not, oh bright star!"**_

_**"Fear not...Oh bright star!"**_

_**"Fear not..."**_

_**"...Oh bright star!"**_

_**"Fear..."**_

_**"Not..."**_

_**"Bright..."**_

_**"Star..."**_

The voice echoed over and over again like a broken record inside of the young man's mind as he whirled around still trying to find the source of the voice, and still his attempt was in vain. He didn't know what exactly was going on, was this what so many people called God? Or maybe was this some other entity all-together? _"Who is..." _The young man paused for a moment, suddenly feeling faint, _"...This...Warmth...?" _Slowly he swirled around still, and slowly he drifted into unconsciousness once more. As he fell, he could feel the warm touch of gentle hands that caught him, and slowly embraced him until he finally rested upon the solid ground. This was the last thing he could remember of this dream. After that, he could feel the softness of his plump pillow, and his warm blankets. However, the familliar touch of those hands remained as he lay comfortably in his bed. "Oh bright star! Fear not." The voice of a middle-aged woman cooed as the young man lay in his bed. It immediately sent a vibe through him that made him suspect it was that same damned voice again. He shot up abruptly after hearing those words spoken to him, and shouted with a cry of horror,"AAAHHH!" He clentched his chest as tightly as he could to stop his heart from beating out of his chest, and he sat pressed up against a wall adjacent to his bed. "Don't worry, Etoile! It was only a nightmare!" The womanly voice chuckled as he panted in fear,"H-How do you know I was dreaming?" Etoile questioned the woman sitting at his bed side. "Oh dear, you were talking in your sleep. You really musn't stay up so late, or you might not have had such a bad dream to begin with." The woman answered with a chuckle, and looked over at Etoile with a smug little stare. "I-I wasn't up _**that**_ late!" He protested, though the woman simply continued to chuckle as he did so. "It's okay, son, just don't do it so often." And with that, she leaned over and kissed Etoile gently on his forehead. "Mom! Really? Is that necessary? I'm seventeen you know! I'm not a little kid anymore!" Etoile groaned as he simultaniously tried to push his mother off of him, and wipe the lipstick from his head. His mother only rolled her eyes and stood back up, "Fine, fine! Have it your way, Etoile." She bent over and picked up a laundry basket she brought up into Etoile's room apparently. "Just hurry and get dressed, your breakfast is getting cold."

Etoile rolled his eyes snarkily, and sighed as she began to walk down the hall, and away from his room. _"Still...That dream was pretty wild. It was unlike anything I've ever dreamt."_ He thought to himself as he lazily crawled out of bed, and stood upon the hardwood floor of his room. _"Oh well. It was all just a dream. Nothing to get too worried over."_ Etoile tried to reassure himself so that he could concentrate on the stuff he had planned for today, and recently he had procrastinated enough towards his agenda. He cautiously took a shirt that was lying on his floor, and sniffed the folds of its sleeves to check its "wearability" status. _"Hmm, still good."_ he thought to himself as he took off his previous shirt that he had slept in, and slipped the new one on. It was rather comfy, and stylish in his eyes- A black V-neck made of 100% cotton. Though now that he had solved the riddle of "what shirt he should wear today", the next question came to mind. _"Which pair of pants should I wear?"_ This was the one million dollar question, but as he scanned the floor of his room, and sifted through piles of towels, blankets, jackets, and socks, he finally found the pair that suited him the most. They were a snug, and loose-fitting pair of denim skinny jeans. The fabric on his jeans looked rather worn out since their original color had faded, and holes littered them on the front and the back. As Etoile trudged out of his room, he grabbed a wallet with a black and white checkered bandanna hanging out of it, and slipped it into his rear-left pocket. "Hola!" He said gleefully as he entered the kitchen-swinging on the side of the doorframe towards the fridge that sat right next to the door. Etoile hummed as he looked through the contents of the fridge, trying to decide on what he was going to eat. "I've already made you something. You'll probably need to sit it in the microwave for about a minute or so." His mother called out to him from the laundry room on the opposite side of where he stood in the kitchen. He looked back and saw the plate of food sitting on an oval table-which made him grimmace at teh sight of it. Cold fried eggs, bacon, and oatmeal. The spoon that stuck out of the pile of oatmeal was pretty much cemented to the plate, and the bacon was all cold and hard, and the eggs...The eggs made him shiver just by looking at them. Etoile dared not try to stick them in his mouth to test them since they looked really greasy, and the yoke looked all crusty. "Ehhh..." He whimpered as he feared the taste of them. Though he quickly thought up a plan, and checked to see if his mother was doing anything. After confirming she was putting her full attention towards the task she put before herself, he took the plate and carefully scraped the food into the garbage can. "Heheheh!" He laughed slyfully as he cleared his plate.

He quickly dropped the plate, and the silverwear into the sink, and took a few items out of the fridge before exiting the kitchen in a rush. "Don't forget to take out the trash!" Etoile's mother cried out as he trudged through the hallway. This made him flinch with disappointment. "Okaaayyy!" He answered back, and then sighed angrily as he slumped over, and walked towards the front door. There were a couple bags of trash sitting on the poorch which had flies buzzing around them. "Awww! Rank!" He exclaimed as he turned his head away and covered his nose, "Doesn't anyone else besides be know how to take out the trash around here?" He growled as he clenched his teeth, and carried the trashbags out to the street. The sound of muffled shouting echoed out into the air from the house next door to Etoile's, and it suddenly elivated to a full out argument as a young woman exited a house as a few glass bottles followed after her, and crashed upon the street. Etoile didn't notice this uproar due to his strain of thought, and inner monologue-griping to himself about the chores he had to do around the house, and how none of his siblings had to do any of the work. Etoile _did_ notice the girl after he slammed the trash bags into the plastic garbage can, and turned to go back into his house. He stopped in his tracks after laying eyes on her, and replaced his previous angered look with a gaze of obliviousness. "Oh, Shosanna! How's it going?" Etoile asked the girl as she stood by the side of the street. "Oh...Hey Etoile." Her voice sounded rather gloomy as she answered, which struck confusion inside of Etoile. "Is something the matter?" Etoile took a few steps closer to Shosanna becoming worried for her now, "I'm just fine." She looked down at the ground as she crossed her arms tightly against her bosom. She looked rather upset, and hopeless, whcih made Etoile feel even more worried for the girl. "It's okay if you tell me. Trust me, I've been down the road of disappointment quite a few times." Etoile laughed to try to lift her spirits up, but Shosanna simply shot him a sideways glance, and then sighed as she stared back down at the ground. "I just want to get away from here. You wanna' go to the spot on the hill?" She asked, changing the subject entirely for some reason. Apparently, she didn't want to speak of the events that took place just moments before Etoile came outside. "Sure! Race you there!" Etoile shouted as he suddenly dashed down the road laughing, and then back-peddling as he looked back at Shosanna-who apparently wasn't going to challenge him. "Slow down!" She cried out to him as she lazily walked in the same direction Etoile was going. "Aww, what's the matter?" Etoile jeered as he ran back towards Shosanna, and walked beside her with his hands tucked in his pocket. "I just don't feel like running." She answered with a half-hearted laugh that made Etoile feel kinda' dumb. _"Yeesh! Must be that time of the month..."_ He thought to himself as raised his brow, and rolled his eyes.

Soon, they both managed to make it to the grassy knoll after a long walk, and a failed attempt to start up a decent conversation on Etoile's part. "Here we are! Man, I love this place." Etoile said as he placed his hands on his hips, and stopped as he took in the view around them. The field in which the grassy knoll stood was about a couple of miles outside of town in some unused acres of land nobody bought. Around their town, farming was a big thing, and it was something Etoile hated, because for one thing, it smelled. Yup, reeked to high heaven, but something about this country environment seemed to appeal to most of the people who lived in this town. Etoile never really understood it, because he himself was what one would call a punk...Well kind of. He lived for chaos, and it was something that he enjoyed doing most. It wasn't anything like full on anarchism or anything, it was just a more cynnical way he looked at the lifestyle the people here lived, and he just got a kick out of messing with people from time to time. Shosanna passed Etoile with little interest as he stood there lost in thought, however he was brought back to earth as she slightly nudged him. "Hey, wait up!" He shouted as he ran to catch up with her. He could tell she was rather distrought about something, but he really couldn't place a finger on it. Was it her birthday, and no one remembered? No...Maybe she missed out on something? Nah, couldn't be that either. Etoile puzzled his chin as he sat upon the grass next to Shosanna, and speculated as to what got her so upset. "I know..." He said as he raised his right index finger in the air, which grabbed Shosanna's attention. "Know what?" She said a little harshly as she looked over at him with a cold, blank stare. "The thing to cheer you up!" Etoile grinned maliciously as he held both of his hands in front of him, and clawed them as he leaned slowly towards Shosanna. "HAA!" Etoile pounced upon Shosanna, and pinned her down to the ground with one hand while tickling her sides with the other. "HAHAHA! Etoile-HAHAHA! Please-AHAHA! Stop!" Shosanna managed to carry out an entire sentence through the laughter as Etoile tickled her mercilessly. "Fiiiine!" He groaned as he sat back down, and allowed Shosanna to sit back up. "You know..." She said, hesitating for a moment as she started wiping the dirt, and blades of grass off her clothing. "Hmm?" Etoile hummed as he looked back at Shosanna. "It worked!" She yelled out as she pounced on Etoile in return, and forced him to submit as she pinned him down to the ground with both of her arms. She peered down at him with her bright blue eyes, and a sly smirk drawn across her face. "Etoile, you're in trouble now!" She teased as she began to press her torso with his, leaning in slowly towards his face with her own. Etoile stared back up helplessly as he became hypnotized with her stare, the only thing he could think to do was to lift his head up slowly as she lowered hers. Gently, both of their lips touched one another in a passionate display of effection. Shosanna's lips pulled away from Etoile's slowly, though Etoile yearned for the soft caress of her blushing lips once more, and he lifted his head back up and kissed her even more passionately than before. It was like a little piece of heaven...

They both lay now on the soft bed of grass that the knoll had to offer, and stared up at the blue sky above. White puffs of clouds wandered aimlessly through the sky, creating shapes that each of them would point out as something that looked familiar to them. They laughed merrily as they went down the list of creatures, objects, and people that they could think of with each passing cloud. The wind blew gracefully down the plaines, and caused the tree behind them to sway slowly back and forth. The leaves hissed as the wind brushed up against the tree, which sounded much like a rushing stream, or a waterfall. All was peaceful for the two of them as they lay upon the grassy knoll, both with each other's hands holding one another, and staring pleasantly up at the sky. "You know, I'm really gonna' miss this when spring break is over." Etoile said as he suddenly recalled that school was not far off, and that both of them would be trapped within the acedemic prison. "Yeah, classrooms are so cold. It'll be tough trying to get used to eight straight, cold hours." Shosanna sighed as she, too was brought back to the reality of their lives. Etoile turned his head and looked at Shosanna, who in turn turned her's towards Etoile. He smiled happily, and then pecked Shosanna on the lips. "Just one more year of it, and then it'll be over." Etoile said to try to comfort Shosanna. She smiled back at him, and then examined his face with her eyes. "So what are you going to do after you graduate?" She questioned Etoile with a sort of sweet, and innocent tone. Etoile stared blankly off into space as he closed one eye, and tried to think of what he had planned on doing. "Hmmm...I don't know yet. Probably hit the road, and see the world, you know? I'm taking a break from hitting the books for a while." Shosanna nodded in understanding of what Etoile meant, but she felt a painful sting when he spoke of him leaving the town. "I don't know what I'm going to do yet..." She said rather depressed as she sighed, and played with Etoile's hand. "Don't worry, it'll come to you." Etoile smiled once more at Shosanna and kissed her on the cheek before standing up. "Come on, let's head out of here." Etoile offered his hand down to help Shosanna up to her feet, which she greatfully took, and allowed him to pull her up. They both walked back towards the town with the sun now setting behind them. They had spent quite a few hours just laying out on the knoll and talking about each other. Etoile could think of no better time spent, though as he looked down at Shosanna as they walked back to their homes, he wondered if she felt the same for him. He had always flirted with the idea of asking Shosanna if they should take their relationship to the next level, and instead of just being friends, well...You get the picture.

"See Yah!" Etoil said as he waved his arm as she went back into her own home. "I enjoyed our time spent today." She said with a smile stretched across her face, and then blew a kiss to Etoile. He smiled back as he waved good-bye, and then he went back into his own home. _"Man! I think I'm in looooooove!"_ He thought as he twirled, and danced around through the hallway into the kitchen, when his mother walked out luckily. He grabbed both of her hands and began to dance with her as he hummed a beat. "Haha! Etoile, what's gotten into you?" She demanded as she laughed while they waltzed across the kitchen floor. "Mother! I love Shosanna!" He jubiliantly said as he let go of his mother, and spun in circles in the middle of the kitchen. "Etoile and Shosanna sittin' in a tree! K-I-S-S-I-N-G!" Three tiny little voices called out from behind Etoile as he danced around in the kitchen. "Ah!" He shouted as the impish little voices laughed and squealed. Three little kids came out from behind the doorway, and jumped around Etoile as he stood there shocked from their sudden appearence. "H-Hey! Don't you guys know how to mind your own business?" Etoile began to try and snatch up one of the little brats with his hands so he could teach thema thing or two about evesdropping upon someone's conversation. They laughed and jeered as they avoided his grasp as Etoile reached out with his arms randomly trying to catch one of them. "Oh you four! Enough!" Their mother said as Etoile finally managed to grab one of the younglings while the others grabbed ahold of his legs. "Sorry mom!" They all said simultaniously as they let go of one another. "Jaque, Charolette, Rosette! The three of you to your rooms! And you Etoile!" Etoile's mom caught him as he began to try to slink away, but he had not been stealthy enough, and she grabbed him by the ear. "Owowowowowow!" Etoile winced while his mother yanked hard on his earlobe. "You have chores to do, mister!" She let go of him, and he immediately began to rub his ear. "You still haven't cleaned out the gutters like I told you to do." She handed him an empty trashbag, and a trowel to help him carry out his task better. "Yes, ma'am..." Etoile sighed as he took the items, and began to walk back outside.

Upon the roof, Etoile mumbled to himself, mocking his mother as he grumpily cleaned out the gutters with the trowel, and plopped the wet leaves and stuff inside the trash bag. "I just need to get a day off!" He said to himself as he sat off the side of his roof, and stared off towards the other side of the street. That's when a strange clicking noise caught his ear. He turned to look where this noise had come from, only to see Shosanna standing at her window positioned as if she had just closed her window. Etoile watched intently as she backed away from her window and undressed for a shower it seemed. "No...Way!" He whispered to himself excitedly, and slunk low so that he was partially hidden from her view if she just so happened to look up. When she finally exposed her full body. Her body was so slender, and so fit, yet the best thing about her at this moment would've had to have been her breasts, that's when Etoile leaned over the side of the roof with his jaw practically dropping all the way to the ground. "Oh my g-!" However, he had veered to far from the support of the roof, and had lost balance. "WOAH!" He shouted as he wobbled, trying to keep his balance on top of the roof, but it was no use, and he tumbled over the side like a sack of bricks. "OOF!" He grunted as he landed with a thud just outside her window. The clicking noise was heard again, followed by some sort of sliding noise, and then Etoile could see Shasanna sticking her head out the window, though now she was covered up with a towel. Her long, maroon hair was draped over one shoulder as she peeked out through her window down at Etoile. "Are you okay?" She asked, laughing softly as she looked upon his collapsed body. "Yeah, yeah...Just fine!" He groaned, laughing sheepishly as he steadily got back to his feet. "Uhh...Yeah, well, see yah!" And with that, he bolted off to the side of his house so she could not see him, and he just stood there pressed against his house breathing heavily. "Stoopid! Stoopid!" He hissed as he began to slap his forehead with his hands.

Sometime later the sun had finally disappeared behind the horizon, and darkness of the night soon fell upon the peaceful town that Etoile and his family lived in. He and the rest of his family were doing various tasks before they all finally went to bed, Etoile barely made any effort in trying to carry himself to his room since his body was worn out with the various tasks his mother made him do after he returned from cleaning out the gutters- aka, spying on Shasanna undressing. "G'night, mom." He moaned while he passed her room, "Good-night, Etoile! Sweet dreams!" She replied with the voice of an angel. _"Man, that woman can snap from being the nicest thing in the universe, to a hellish demon in a split second."_ He thought to himself as he walked into his room, and threw his pants off. _"I've gotta' try to get out of the house tomorrow...The sunflower festival is coming pretty soon, maybe I could help with setting up and stuff?" _Etoile began going over the options in his head about the various things he could do, though no matter what he thought about, Shasanna's face always seemed to wander into his mind, which caused him to become lost in daydreaming about the lives they could spend together. _"Yeah..."_ He sighed, thinking to himself again as he plopped down into his bed, and covered himself with his blankets. _"Fat chance..."_ Etoile slowly began to drift into sleep after he shut his eyes, and thought of nothing but Shosanna.

**_"Remember, your shadow grows more the closer you get to the light."_**


	3. Chapter 2: Day 2Forgotten Sorrow

Chapter 2: Day 2, and the Forgotten Sorrow

It was in that moment of returning to the realm of sleep that Etoile remembered the dream that took place the previous night, and his fears of the shadowy realm were re-discovered. This time, however, it felt more real than the last time he had visited, and this made his fears grow even worse. The soothing voice, and the comfort that it brought did not appear. Why was it absent? Did it regularly appear once to people with "powerful light", and then thrust them back into the world of shadows all by themselves? It didn't make one bit of sense to Etoile as he stood there on the infinite plaines of the shadows. This reoccurring dream he had was definitely a sign of some sort, maybe for events that were to come? Was this an example of his inevitable death? All things would die eventually, but this did not frighten him in the least bit. The thing that did, though, was the fact he felt naked standing there on the plaines of darkness. He felt vulnerable, and he didn't like it. It was like coming to school, but only just then realising that he had forgotten to wear pants. This place was all too frustrating, why was he placed here again? _"I don't understand..."_ Etoile whispered as he placed his hands on his face, and fell to his knees. He was like a newborn baby-put into the world by means unknonw to him, and forced to try to make out as to what this new, and unknown world was. It was truly frightening, and Etoile felt as if there was no escape. _"What must I do...?"_ His question was simple, and plain. Etoile grasped his shoulders as his body began to quiver, and he layed down on his side while curling his legs up to his chest. _"What does this all mean...?"_ Still he sought answers, but his attempt to find them were in vain. He was like a fly trying to escape from a glass prison, he could see the outside, but he kept hitting this invisible boundary that kept him from realising the truth. Was this the darkness's plan, to capture him, and break him within the shadows? This nightmare felt like it would go on forever. Etoile's body was now half-way submerged in a thick cloud of the mist that lay in a thin veil across the plaines, he was hopeless, and he was scared, but most of all he wished the voice would return, and grant him the same warmth that it did before.

Nothing...

As Etoile closed his eyes to shut away the nightmare, he felt as though his body was spinning in circles, and not allowing him to keep his eyes shut. _"No..."_ He moaned as he lay there with his hands over his face still. He tossed and turned as the nightmare tried to force his eyes open, but he resisted with every ounce of his strength. One thousand hands reached out, and grabbed Etoile as he churned-a last effort of resistance against the belly of the beast he lay in. _**"Etoile..." **_A familiar voice called out from the abyss, sending shivers down his spine. _**"Etoile..."**_ The voice was like a whisper across the wind, elegantly drifting across his eardrums like the smooth sailing of a phantom. _**"Etoile..."**_ The voice became more apparent, and much louder than before. _"No...!"_ He cried out, still turning with each time the voice came to him. The arms still held him, and shook him, though he thought they were trying to force his eyes open. "Etoile! Wake up!" The cry of Etoile's mother shook him wide awake as he lay in his comfortable bed. He arose with a panic, and scurried up against the wall like he did the previous morning, grasping his chest tight, and panting heavily in fear. "Etoile! See? What did I tell you? You must get to bed earlier tonight." His mother said softly, trying to ease his fear. "You really need to quit that!" Etoile said between breaths as he stared at his mother, and shaking his head as he spoke. "You know outside influences can cause people to have wild and crazy dreams?" Etoile went on, this time lecturing her with some bit of knowledge he happened to have picked up. "No, silly, that's just an urban legend. Now get dressed, someone's here to see you." His mother was kneeling at his bedside this time, and she wearily got up, and then walked out of Etoile's room. "Awesome..." He said to himself as he leaped out of bed, and changed into something a little bit more sociable. Not much of a change in wardrobe, since he still wore the same pants, bandanna hanging out of his pocket, same shoes, though this time he simply changed shirts. There was not much of a change in doing this, since the shirt was a V-neck as well, but it was white(which was the only diference). Etoile quickly rushed into the bathroom to take a look at his hair, and the wet his hands, and simply ran them through his hair to keep his same spikey hair-doo. Faux-hawks were in this year, but he really didn't matter what was _**in **_since he never cared what looks other people liked, but only cared for the look he liked to pull off.

Practically sprinting through the hallway, and then up to the front door, Etoile burst outside, and came to a halt. Standing before him was someone very close to his own height-if not the same-, and wearing a pair of baggy camo shorts, a black t-shirt, black knee-high socks, and red checkered slip-on shoes. The person smiled at Etoile as he made his fabulously late appearance, and held his hand up to signal he was getting ready to perform a bro handshake. "Yo! Etoile! What's up, man?" He said with a wide grin on his face as Etoile met this person's hand with his own. "Yo, Balthazar! Missed you, bro! When did you come back?" Etoile was happy to see this person, since they had been friends ever since kindergarten. Balthazar had been away on a cruise or something, which left Etoile very bored during spring break. "Just this morning! I came to visit you earlier, but you slept in apparently, so I came back after lunch, and I guess my hunch was right. Haha!" Balthazar put his other arm around Etoile's shoulders as they shook hands, and began to walk with him out towards the street. "Really? Oh, I'm sorry dude...I had a really messed up dream." Etoile said rather gloomily. "What was it about? Was it I, Balthazar stealing your chicas? Heheh!" Balthazar placed his right hand on the rim of his own shorts, and pelvic thrusted once as he spoke, laughing the entire time. It was a comedic attempt to cheer Etoile up, and also a humorous attempt to get at him-with no intention of a negative meaning. Etoile smiled maliciously, and shoved Balthazar away from him,"No, it was I, Etoile, stealing your fine-assed mother!" Etoile chuckled while doing the exact same thing Balthazar did to him. Balthazar shouted out with disbelief as Etoile made a perfectly fine comeback towards Balthazar's previous question. "Well, either way, we're both lucky." Balthazar said, and then hit Etoile's chest with his hand, though there appeared to be something within his palm. Taking his hand, and prying the object out, Etoile was grasping a rolled-up piece of paper that was advertising something. "What is this?" He said, unbeknownst to what Balthazar was planning. "It's an event, dude! Everyone's going, it'll be a blast!" Balthazar exclaimed with sheer excitment lingering on his words. "Do you know when it's going to be held?" Etoile asked, curious now of what was in store. Wait a moment, didn't Etoile think about going to something yesterday? Just what was it exactly? This really bugged him, why couldn't he remember? "That's funny..." Etoile whispered to himself, placing his index and thumb of his right hand on his chin, and holding his right elbow with the opposite arm. "What's funny?" Balthazar asked, curious as to what Etoile was thinking to himself. "N-Nothing. Let's go to the store, maybe we'll find Bretta and Jesse there." Etoile said trying to change the subject. Balthazar hesitated for a minute as Etoile walked passed him, and then he ran to catch up to Etoile. "Wait up!"

Something weird was definitely going on, first he was having those dreams-no, those night terrors. Now he was experiencing memory loss. What sort of crazy shit was in store for him? The duo walked along the side of the road towards the center of the town. It wasn't a very big town, just a few blocks with buildings on them, and a railroad in the oldest region of the town. Just think of a suburban neighborhood built around a historic town. Cars drove steadily by as Etoile and Balthazar walked down the street to a gas station not too far from where Etoile lived. There, two other teenagers were loitering about an ice machine with a big sign on it that said,"Out of order." As the duo approached the store, the two other teens saw them, and shouted,"Hey guys!" There was a rather petite female with long, brown hair sitting on top of the ice machine while the other teen-a tall, skinny, dark skinned male-stood with his arms crossed, and leaning up against the machine. "Yo!" Balthazar shouted as he ran over to meet the two. Etoile grinned subtly as he watched the three exchange a series of secret handshakes and chest bumps, though a tingling sensation began to overtake his hand. It felt as thought it had fallen asleep, or something. _What?_ He thought as he examined his hand. "Yo! Etoile! Whacha' waitin' for? Christmas?" Balthazar cried out, which snapped Etoile back into reality. "Coming!" He replied, jogging steadily over to the three of his friends. "Hey Etoile!" The young girl giggled as she watched Etoile approach, and blush. "Hey Bretta." He said with a simple wave of his hand. "Sup, dawg?" The taller male said as he walked up to Etoile, and proceeded to perform yet another bro handshake. "Hey Jesse." Etoile replied, which set off the taller teen for some reason. "Hey! The name's Juicy J., remember?" He seemed rather flustered, but Etoile only raised his two hands up in surrender. "My bad!" He had a nervous grin on his face until the dark-skinned friend calmed down. "Ah, it's 'aight. Nice to see you two again! Never thought I'd be happier to hang out. Only had Bretta keeping me company, and pleasing women is not my cup of tea." He placed his hand on the side of his mouth so as to keep what was to be said secret from Bretta. "_Pleasing them the old-fashioned way, that is!"_ He whispered, which made Balthazar, and Etoile chuckle. "Hey! I heard that! What? Am I no fun?" Bretta shouted as she crossed her arms. "N-No! It's just that-" "Then you shouldn't have asked me to be your girlfriend, then! Hmph!" She continued her rant, and turned her head away from Jesse. "Aww, baby! Don't be like that!" Jesse began to plead with her, and practically knelt down on his knees shaking his clasped fists at her-as if praying to the gods.

Etoile and Balthazar laughed heatily as Bretta humiliated Jesse, who at this point was practically to tears. "C'mon, let's go do something." Balthazar said tapping Jesse on the shoulder, and laughing still. Bretta hopped down from the ice machine and caught up to Etoile and Balthazar as they walked away. Jesse followed quickly behind her, and tried to grab her hand, but she snatched it away, and crossed her arms. They were a happy posse, and it seemed that nothing could pull them apart _for long._ Etoile and Balthazar didn't meet Jesse or Bretta until later on in their lives. Etoile and Balthazar were actually the first two of the posse, and Jesse was the third. They met Jesse one day after grade school when a bunch of bullies had him cornered in an alley downtown. Luckily for him, Etoile and Balthazar just happened to be chilling out around that area, and saw how those horrible brutes ganged up around him. Yeah, sure they were only 10 at the time, but they could still whoop the shit out of other kids, and after a long, brutal bloodbath-and even taking a few lickings themselves- Etoile and Balthazar managed to chase off the bullies, and successfully rescue who would be their new buddy. When they all finally managed to get to middle school, they met Bretta. She was from some other town somewhere far away, and since then Jesse's been panting behind her like a little puppy. It was strange to think that this was their final year in school together, though they still had a few weeks left to milk out, but after that time goes by, they'd all be going their seperate ways. Balthazar would head off to basic military training, Jesse would be moving out to study music, and hoping to make a career out of it. Bretta would be going off to dance school, which would leave Etoile all alone in this little dead-end town. Where's the fun in that? He'd probably be stuck doing chores until he got sick of it and went on that road trip he was talking to Shosanna about. Come to think of it, now that he remembered Shosanna's beautiful, and angelic eyes, Etoile began to crave her audience. In fact, he thought nothing ill of that girl, and he had hoped that by the end of the break they would both be a couple. It wasn't so far fetched as it sounded, because he could've sworn that she liked him the same way he adored her. Why wouldn't it make sense? The way her lips caressed his was like a midsummer's night dream, it was just perfect. Etoile knew right then and there that he would hopefully meet her at this gathering his town was having, and then he would be able to ask her himself.

"Etoile!" Balthazar shouted, practically three inches from his face while the others stood around and looked at the two of them. "Huh?" Etoile had been completely oblivious to everything around them, and to what they were doing. Apparently they had come to some sort of festival, because there were tents, and rides set up all over the place. This was their town's annual spring-time carnival, which featured tons of fabulous rides, food, and musical guests. It was themed much like an old circus, though minus the clowns and animals. "Are you gonna' pay your share?" Balthazar followed up with this question, and looked at Etoile with his arms crossed, and his eyebrows cocked. "O-Oh yeah!" Etoile finally remembered, and pulled out the munny which was required for his own ticket. He handed it over to Balthazar-who took it begrudgingly while staring down Etoile-, and then looked over at the other two. Bretta had been giggling the entire time as she watched Balthazar try to snap Etoile back to reality. "What's so funny?" He asked, and looking quite flustered. "you were thinking about Shosanna, weren't you?" Bretta said with a sly tone, almost like she was teasing Etoile. "Was not!" He exclaimed as he pointed a finger at Bretta,"Yo, dawg. She be a triflin' hoe. You keep your shit away from that." Jesse said with his deep, and dull tone. "Hey! Watch it! She's a nice girl." Etoile said as he crossed his arms and glared up at Jesse. "Hey man, it's whatevz. If you don't believe me, fine, but just so you know, I saw her yesterday with a couple of guys. One of them she seemed to be getting a little too friendly with, if you smell what I'm steppin' in." Jesse nudged Bretta at the end of his statement and chuckled, though Bretta didn't seem the least bit humored by what he had to say. Jesse looked back over at Etoile, who seemed wrecked by this news that Jesse dilivered to him. "Was it something I said?" Jesse said rather confused as to what Etoile was feeling. "Where did you see her?" Etoile said with a fragile tone, almost as if he were at the point of getting ready to burst into tears. "At the back alley of the Warehouse Market...Why? Ohh..." Jesse finally realised what was happening, and began to feel really dumb about what he said. Bretta looked up at him with an angry face, and her fists resting upon her hips while she growled at Jesse. "Do you not have a heart?" She snapped, causing Jesse to flinch. "Hey! I'm just lookin' out for my boi! Don't act like _I'm_ the monster! It was the truth!" Etoile began to look very depressed at this point, and stared down at his feet, and hunching over slightly with his arms hanging down by his sides. Jesse and Bretta looked over at Etoile with a worried look on their faces. "Are you okay, Etoile?" Bretta asked as she walked up to Etoile, and placed her tiny little hand on his shoulder. Jesse walked over as well, and placed his hand on his other shoulder. "Yo man, I didn't mean to be so harsh. I know how you feel for her, heh, I've known since the beginning of Highschool." Jesse also attempted to comfort Etoile.

Balthazar came back right about this point with everybody's tickets, and a big smile spread across his face. "Woo hoo! Let the festivities commence! haha-Oh? Hey, what's up with Etoile?" Balthazar suddenly became worried as well as he walked up to the other three, and slightly pushed Jesse and Bretta aside. "You gonna' be okay man?" Etoile nodded as he continued to look down at his feet, and hunch over. "Well, whatever it is, you'll forget about it after a couple of rides. So c'mon! We've got some partying to do!" And with that, he handed everyone their tickets, and lifted Etoile's chin so that he would look at him. "Don't worry about it! Look, by the end of the day, you won't remember a thing about it." Balthazar was always good at cheering Etoile up, which seemed to work 100% of the time. Etoile smiled and put his shoulder around Balthazar-who in turn did the same with Etoile. "Let's go fuck shit up!" Etoile shouted with a rock on hand gesture, and then sticking his tongue out. Balthazar laughed histerically, and then replied with his own loud,"YEAH!" and the tow of them bumped fists. Sprinting along the fairgrounds with seemingly weightless feet, the four of them raced through the carnival dodging people, and machines alike to get to the rides they wanted to go on the most. The first was a teacup ride that allowed you to spin while sitting inside of a giant teacup by turning a wheel in the center. The four of them rode in one teacup, and spun it violently as they all shouted, and cheered with glee. They did this until they couldn't walk straight after getting out, and then they were off to the next item on their list. There was a massive, elongated cage that had many chambers suspended along it, and it was cleverly dubbed "The Chainsaw". The four of them split up into pairs, and rode in two seperate chambers. When the ride finally went off, the giant cage began to lift, and flip upside-down, and caused the chambers around it to rotate fast. Unfortunately for Jesse, he had something to eat prior to coming on this ride, and he began to feel nausious. "Ohhh man..." He groaned as his face turned green. When the ride finally came to an end, he literally flew out of the chamber he was in-knocking Bretta out of the way practically-, and went to the nearest garbage can he could find. "BLUUUUAAAAHHH!" Jesse projectile-vomitted inside of the garbage can as he got up to the side of it, and slunk his head over it. "Awww! Nasty!" Balthazar shouted as the three of them laughed, and pointed at Jesse. "Couldn't hold it, huh Jess?" Etoile kept the taunts going as the three of them laughed at the scene unfolding before them. Bretta couldn't think of anything to say since her laughter rendered her unable to speak. "Shut up guys..." Jesse moaned as he lifted his sicky green face away from the garbage can so he could look at teh trio laughing their asses off.

As the night commenced, the four friends had a wonderfull blast at the festival. Riding all kinds of carnival rides, playing games-and utterly loosing-, and enjoying food fried so deep that it could cause a heart attack with one bite(an exaggeration of course). The sun had not yet set beyond the horizon, and as the twilight took its hold over the sky, the four friends found themselves stumbling to the front gates of the carnival. "Oh man! That was tons of fun! I can't wait until next year!" Balthazar said as he bent over his knees, and tried to catch his breath from all the running. Etoile stood a few feet away, and placed his hands on his hips as he, too tried to catch his breath. "All I know...Is that...I'm exhausted!" Etoile said between breaths. Bretta came riding on Jesse's back with her head laying against his shoulders, and her eyes closed. There was a peaceful smile across her face as she rested, and Jesse hadn't waisted his energy racing towards the front entrance to the carnival. "I think it's about time to head home. What do ya' guys think?" Jesse said with a dull, and tired sounding tone. Etoile and Balthazar looked at each other and shrugged,"Maybe, we had one helluva day." Balthazar groaned as he stood straight back up, and stretched his arms. Etoile yawned, and then turned his head to view the setting sun. "I may have forgotten what I was so upset about, but I know for sure that I'll never forget teh time we had today." Etoile sounded all philosophical as he stared off into the setting sun, and Balthazar, and Jesse both smiled when they looked at him. "When this school year's over, let's promise to keep in touch, eh?" Balthazar said as he walked up behind Etoile, and patted his left shoulder. Etoile turned around and nodded,"Yeah." Jesse chuckled, adn then turned back around as the three of them walked back home. It was a fun day indeed, and with all of this fun came the forgetfullness of previous sorrows felt. However, the discords Etoile felt inside when Jesse mentioned Shosanna being with another guy had not been forgotten permanent, and soon he would recall the pain he felt inside that stabbed like a sharp blade. The three of them waved good-bye to each other-with the exception of the slumbering Bretta-, and then parted ways down the road. Etoile and Balthazar were the only two of the group who remained with each other as they walked towards Etoile's house, and when they finally reached his front yard, it was a bittersweet feeling. "Well, I guess I'll be seeing you tomorrow. We got a big day ahead of us." Balthazar said as he yawned, and then scratched his back. "Yeah, I'll make sure not to sleep in too late." Etoile laughed, and then the two of them shook hands. "Take it easy, Etoile." Balthazar said as they relinquished each other's hands,"And if it's easy, take it twice! Haha." The two of them laughed at this joke, and then they, too parted ways.

Etoile walked into his home reluctantly, remembering the nightmares he had, and knowing he'd be going to bed sooner or later. His mother and siblings weren't in sight at the moment, which meant he could make an unnoticed entrance. Still, though, the thought of Shosanna struck his memory again, an as he passed by a living room window, he could see the window to her own room. _"Shosanna please...Don't deceive me." _He thought to himself with a heavy sigh, feeling the pain of a love gone to waste. He walked quietly back to his room so that he would not be confronted by his family, and then shut the door silently behind him when he entered his room. Taking his shoes, and his pants off, Etoile jumped into bed, and layed down to go to sleep. Still, the thought of the one he had strong emotions for being held by another guy, and being loved the way he loved her just yesterday hurt him. There was no greater pain felt then the pain of a cracked heart, though he wouldn't go as far as to call it broken, because if worse came to worse, he wasn't going to let this girl completely ruin his life...Or would he? He fought with the question, trying to thwart it with a confident denial, but he always found himself being saddened by the thought of her not loving him. It didn't matter, though, at least not right now...Not yet. Slowly, Etoile closed his eyes, and peacefully drifted off to sleep.

**_"Don't lose hope..."_**


End file.
